Depression after Retirement: Loneliness Warning
Depression after retirement, loneliness warning to make you aware. With the numbers of retired citizens raising daily, considering the dangers of this developing into depression is important. You need to be aware of for yourselves as well for your family and friends.
Many are lonely
Do you find yourself occasionally lonely since you retired? 43% of the retired people surveyed recently in a California research project answered yes to this question.
Most people are born wanting and needing connections with others.
This seems to be a universal part of our DNA makeup.
Surprises along the way
Retirement and the adjustment often lead to more isolation than you had planned for.
The lack of social connection to workplace friends makes such a change in your life.
Often recently retired people need to make sure there is enough room in your life for adding acquaintances. Or maybe you should add activities that will help you make new acquaintances.
Single retired adults often have a heads up for preparing for this time in their lives, as they have had to take more control of being “active on purpose” socially.
Couples often depend on their spouses to help maintain the need for friends. While your mate is hopefully your best friend, you will usually find a need for other social contacts and people to do things with. You may also need to make friends on purpose, or join some different activities that can help you make new friends.
Even though you planned
If you planned and retire into a traveling lifestyle, you will usually find lots of opportunities for casual socialization just due to the changing places you will find yourself in.
This kind of casual conversations and spending time around others works well, in a traveling mode.
However, when this time is done and you are settling in at home to live your everyday retirement living life, many will feel the need to have some social times with people who have some of the same interests and experiences you have.
This everyday living time is when most people began to realize how much their lives have changed. While you are traveling, daily life is like an extended vacation. Days are usually exciting and you are ready for the different experiences this brings.
Finding ways for having fun and exciting things to do along through your days of retirement is when the challenges of being lonely arise, even if you are there in the house with your spouse.
Don’t allow yourself to get isolated
Your natural social self may find it more difficult to settle down for a more isolated lifestyle. You may need more friends to do things with.
This feeling of loneliness is similar to what you experienced as a child. You don’t really want to be back in elementary school where you were comfortable, having been there all these years.
Yet, Jr. High seemed such an unknown place and time. New buildings and classrooms, the new teacher you hadn’t seen before. So many people you didn’t know.
So many adjustments
You knew you should be excited, but you were also a bit scared the first days when those kids you had walked shoulder to shoulder with are walking down a different hall. On their way to different classes.
These kids in your new classroom look a bit different, don’t ask the same questions. Have a different lunchtime and a different lunch preference. You are all trying to find your place in this new world.
So is the adjustment to retirement time. You are finding your place in a new world. It is different and surely will include sometimes of feeling lonely.
You as a retired senior citizen owe it to yourself to be aware and alert. Recognize when the feeling of adjustment to retirement boredom becomes more than a fleeting feeling.
Depression is usually a silent event. It just kind of happens day by day. You think you are scooting along doing great, and all of a sudden you realize that you have lost your zest for life.
Daily living becomes more and more mundane, less exciting.
If you have planned your retirement so that you can get on with the other interests you have in life, you already know how much fun retirement living can be. You may have an occasional boring day, but most are busy and you are happy doing what you like to do.
It was a shock to me to realize that I was bored after about 3 years of retirement. When I first retired, our youngest daughter was expecting her first baby. She began to experience some difficulties during the 7th month of her pregnancy. At that point, she was hospitalized off and on for several weeks until delivery.
Knowing that I had “cause” after retirement helping her with the baby and helping her to take care of her health helped the days pass pretty quickly.
Anyone who has had the privilege of being part of a grandchild’s life at any age can vouch for the way hours, days and weeks can be absorbed taking care of little ones.
After a quick recovery, and a few nights sleep, the new mom, and baby were self-reliant. and my role was dissolving, as it should have. With some babysitting stints, the days rocked along quickly.
Then the older daughter decided to stay home for a while and she found things for us to do that were fun. Things that we didn’t have time for while working. So more time went by.
However the handwriting was on the wall, she was going to go back to work eventually. The granddaughter in that household was graduating soon, and mom was getting the urge to go back to work.
The “baby” I got to help with to start retirement with is 5 years old.
I soon found myself start resenting keeping house. I had always loved spending time keeping our retirement home. However, the Jr. high kid that came out in me had the feelings of frustration because I found cleaning the house the highlight of the week!
This is not what I had retired for. Certainly not to clean house all day, every day.
I was slowly losing the desire to keep the house, do laundry, do anything. Even cook.
I tried relearning to crochet, that was not it. Then jewelry took my interest. At least attending classes and shopping for materials to work with. This is something I still enjoy, but only for short spans of time.
Sewing, a long time interest in the past? Well, that was not so fulfilling either.
Finally, it dawned on me that these were some of the symptoms of depression. I had no real passion for life. Yes, the things that are fun to do when you are in your 30’s change when you are retired.
However, nothing was fun.
My days were boring, uneventful. and didn’t want to be social.
37 years as a cosmetologist, working with people more or less in my face all day every day had used me up socially. Add 11 years of doing individual income tax returns, again people in front of you, I really was not interested in a lot of people at one time.
I just enjoyed being at home. This is where I wanted to be and where I wanted to spend my days.
I knew that I needed to engage my mind and work on something that I really wanted to be involved in. So for me, the answer was to become a member of the Wealthy Affiliate Learning Group. (click the link to check it out)
The challenges here give me something to be engaged in.
The network of fellow students, both professional and beginner gave me lots of social connections. I can network with people all over the world and when I need help receive assistance from Scotland, Australia, Holland, England and many places between, including fellow Texans.
Fulfilling a dream
For me learning to do something different, a dream that I had for a number of years and just didn’t know where to start. Building my online business was it for me.
Now I do know where to start. How to build a website using some of the wonderful technology that we have available. Here I learned how to do research and share what I find to answer my questions about retirement living.
Hopefully, you can find something of interest to make your retirement days better.
Warning Depression after retirement
When you are experiencing feelings of depression, it is time to take action and help yourself.
Often depression will require the help of a professional. If you have any questions about your stability mentally, please get some help.
This is a whopping big change that you have to make to retirement living. You must be responsible for your own mental state.
For some of us, this can be done through awareness and a willingness to make a choice and change. For others, it is more serious and needs more than what worked for me to become engaged.
Please don’t disregard your mental well being.
Do any of this partial list of symptoms seem to fit your thought patterns?
Is this you
- Eating too much, drinking too much
- Loss of interest in things that were important to you in the past?
Remember, there are many more symptoms. This is just the list that made me know I needed to make some changes.
I often check out this website, among many more, to see what is being suggested here for making my life better. (sixtyandme.com/6-creative-ways-to-fight-loneliness-after-60/) This is a site built by a lady who is retired. She does have information that is beneficial for men.
What do you do to see how others are living their retirement life? Are you always on the lookout to improve your retirement living?
Check out this story about retirees not being bored for sure just click on this Could this be in your future?